You already know how to fill a calendar. Honestly, if they gave a graduate degree for it, most of us would qualify. We have been managing our own schedules and everyone else’s for years. Color-coded, time-blocked, synced to our phones, and backed up in a paper planner just in case.
So when that feeling of being behind shows up, it is not because we can’t plan. We plan beautifully. The problem is something else.
Look at what is actually on that calendar. If you are honest with yourself, most of it is maintenance. Doctor appointments, school pickups, grocery runs, car service, work deadlines. Taking care of your body, your home, and your people. All necessary. All good. But when did you last see your vision on there? When did you last block time for what you are building, who you are becoming, the thing that keeps showing up in the back of your mind?
It is not there because there is no room. We filled every inch of the page with managing and maintaining, leaving no space for creating and becoming.
I know some of you are in seasons right now where this is not a calendar problem at all. You are caregiving. You are dealing with a health issue. You lost someone. Some days, you are just trying to hold things together, and there is genuinely no margin. I see you, and this is not about adding more pressure. But for the days when we do have some choice, when we do have some say in how the hours go, I want to ask: are we using that choice well?
Here is something I have noticed in my own life and in the women I work with. When the calendar is all maintenance and nothing else, we start to feel flat. We get things done. We check things off. But there is no energy in it. Maintenance keeps life running. It does not move us forward, light us up, or remind us why we are doing any of this in the first place.
I believe there are actually two kinds of overwhelm, and I think we mix them up. One comes from not knowing where to start. That is usually a clarity issue, and it is work I do with my clients all the time. But the other kind comes from knowing exactly what you want and having absolutely no room for it. You are clear. You are motivated. You just have no space. That second kind is the one I want you to think about today.
And here is the part nobody says out loud: a lot of us feel guilty putting ourselves on the calendar. It’s true. If the time is not going toward someone else, it feels selfish. It feels like something we have to earn first. I can’t tell you how many clients have said they feel guilty about taking time to “just” read during the day. So we keep waiting until things slow down, until we get through this season, until the kids are older or the project wraps, or life is calmer. It does not get calmer-it is life, my friends. We have to decide to make space before it is convenient.
Every Sunday, I look at my calendar for the week ahead. Yes, I still keep a paper one. I use online calendars for reminders, but I love seeing it written down. And I look at it honestly. Not just what is on it, but what it is going to feel like to live that week. Is there anything in there for me? Not for my obligations, not for the people I love, but for who I am becoming? For the work I feel called to do?
If the answer is no, I change something right then, before my week starts. A walk with no phone, no podcast, just quiet thinking time. A half hour with my journal to get everything out of my head and onto the page. A blocked hour to work on what I am building. It does not have to be long. But it has to have space to exist.
Because space is not wasted time. That is the part I really want you to take with you. The blank block in your calendar is not empty. It is where the good thinking happens. It is where clarity comes from. When I am walking without distraction or sitting with my journal, that is where I figure things out. That is where I remember what I actually want. The busy parts of our days keep us moving. The open parts help us move in the right direction.
Before you start your week, look at your calendar and ask yourself one honest question. Is there anything on here for me? Not for what I have to do, but for who I am becoming?
If not, you do not need a new system. You need to make a different choice
Talk to you next week,
Monday with Meryl
